The number one thing every Potterhead needs

As a fandom, us potterheads have made it our sole job to make sure that everyone learns about the awesome universe of magic and monsters that shaped our childhoods and still has us looking through the mailbox for late Hogwarts letters every July. We lend copies of the books to people who have only seen the movies, and insist that everyone read at least one. We drag our friends to Harry Potter Clubs. We force friends to cosplay with us and tag them in posts about obscure characters from the Marauders generation.

To most of us, the idea that anyone over the age of twelve doesn’t know Harry Potter is foreign and uncomfortable. It doesn’t make any sense why someone would pointedly avoid such an excellent series.

And that’s quite possibly what’s so enticing about the podcast, Potterless.

Potterless is founded, produced and voiced by Mike Schubert, a newbie to the Potterverse. Schubert, 25, started the podcast after years of nagging from friends and family members to read the books.

The premise? Schubert reads a few chapters and digs into what makes the books so good but so bad at the same time. He calls in Potterhead friends and together they discuss plot holes, bad writing and the “squad” (Harry, Hermione and Ron).

With aggressive sarcasm and next-to-no knowledge of the series (he’s seen 4.5 films, to be exact), Schubert’s grasp of what’s to come is both hilarious and disconcerting. Between mispronunciations and exacerbated comments, Schubert analyzes the series while still reminding us it was made for nine year olds.

Schubert’s many guests defend their beloved series from his tirades against Dobby, Quidditch and the names of the four founders. Accurate digs and calculated defenses create endless snarky and entertaining back-and-forths. Their exchanges aren’t all PG, but, on the background of a children’s book, this only manages to make their discussions more ironic and iconic.

The best part of the podcast is that Potterheads review the Harry Potter books in detail and debate along with Schubert and his friends. Ever wondered why Christmas exists in the Potterverse? Join Schubert as he screams into the void about it. Forgot seemingly meaningless and random details about character descriptions or potion names? Don’t worry, Schubert will probably make fun of them.

Potterless serves as the podcast for anyone who uses Hogwarts’ houses as icebreakers, or those who’ve seen “A Very Potter Musical” as least ten times. It’s the perfect blend of sarcasm and analysis we all wish our book reports would achieve.

So, pop in some headphones, pull up Spotify or Apple Podcasts, and listen to Mike Schubert explain why Hufflepuffs aren’t actually all that nice. And, as they say at Hogwarts, “Wizard on!”