A fantasy football rejection letter


photo via ESPN

Dear Miss Dillon,

Thank you for submitting an application to become a member of the Crowe Codes Fantasy Football league! We appreciate your consideration for our prestigious group!

The Crowe Codes is a new, developing Dynasty league currently with nine members. Our owners have combined for over 50 playoff appearances and 20 championships in recent years. The league’s foundation is built off of competitive, yet entertaining adolescents.

To complete our league, we were accepting applications from a lucky person to become a manager of one franchise. We had an abundance of stellar applicants with impeccable backgrounds and a vast knowledge of the NFL.

Due to the limited amount of spots, we have decided to decline your application, as we feel the Crowe Codes Fantasy Football League would not be a proper fit for your abilities. Your experience with fantasy football is not at the standards we require in our league. Also, your lack of general NFL knowledge would put you at a disadvantage against the top-tier members who understand the game of football. Only naming three NFL players (two coming from assistance by Mia Gallagher) spoke volumes in suggesting your inability to thrive in this position.

However, this is not the end of your journey! We still suggest you pursue a Fantasy Football career, as playing fantasy football teaches people basic marketing skills (buying/selling, trading, and communication). To help jump start your career, we believe you should join a random league of the ESPN Fantasy Football app to develop the skills needed to become an elite owner in the future. Depending on the situation, there is always a possibility of an available team, which means you can reapply.

For now, we would thank you for your interest in the Crowe Codes Fantasy Football League, and we wish you the best of luck in your search!

Dylan Feltovich

Commissioner of the Crowe Codes Fantasy League